Thoughts have muddled, and will continue to interject, my mind like lightning within a gentle cloud. No matter how much I withdraw from it, its inevitable force will come to find me. Sometimes, it may even be misleading: beginning firstly as a gentle spray of mist and then, with the eyes closed and the muscles relaxed, a pebble comes forth and
gouges the eye. Then what happens. The thoughts are taken aback. The eyes flitting about trying to decipher what just occurred.
This is what happens to me. I feel warm, gentle, refreshed, and then something more like a thorn claims my nerves. And this, what I am about to recount, is what I do when such a moment occurs. I’ve had this image for quite some time and I’m sure that it will continue to comfort me. Because I know that when the pebble strikes or the thorn injects itself inside me, what I see thereafter, if only for a moment, is false. I am succumbed to temptation, to desperation. Thoughts of my girlfriend draped in a knowing and convincing body, but it is not her. Thoughts that I have of her, things that are contrary to my heart and soul. I know which among them are my friends and whence the wicked foes came.
I neither fight nor run away. I conquer. And this is what I see. I’ve imagined myself spinning around in place. I would catch sight of her waiting for me, pleading with her inert eyes and body. And then following a few turns I would face the other way. Slowly start to move I would at first, for temptation is a force that tries and tries. In a moment, wings appear upon my back. They look like funnels of clouds that drift to my aid, and I imagine that wings form from them. When this happens, I am hastened by them as the wings motion themselves with a swift and necessary push. Then I go forward at an immeasurable speed, and ahead of me I see light. Warm, infallible, resplendent light. As I continue forward, she falls into my arms. “Ah, there you are,” I say to her gently. I hold her as we continue together from the same push.
In the distance, clouds come together. They appear unwelcoming with their dark nuance building and stark light contained within. My eyes peer left and right, and there is no way around them. It is inevitable, but the wings
of faith have pushed me this way. In my heart, I know that, some how, I’m going to make it. Some how. And I cannot stop. This is not the mind that drives me forward. I attain my knowledge and use wisdom to guide it rightly. I am hesitant, but I also learn that faith is strong. So I continue inevitably through. “Close your eyes!” are the last words I speak before we enter through the first of copious storm clouds. My shirt is torn, my eyes quiver, my heart beats madly, but he is not angry. Faith is stronger. Tears fall, but they are not bitter. Humans should embrace them
rather than hide from them. I am the first to feel embittered rain, but my heart weeps joy, for Faith is stronger.
I feel a warm, lighter nuance of black beneath my eyelids. The tawdry efforts of devilish ways are of poor taste and little influence upon souls who are awaken. I open my eyes and the light before me remains ever glistening. I look up to find a liquid flowing above us. Within hands reach, she encounters some of the dew with her fingers, and the gold allure falls to my face. My eyes flit and
smile and my lips follow, not having to taste that which nourrishes my soul.
adamintheeve 